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The Burqini

My female muslim readers need not give up the active lifestyle of their youth. Ahiida.com brings you active wear that Mohommed would approve of!

There's swimwear that is sure to avoid titillating anyone's senses by revealing too much skin. (Note: does not protect against water that may have at some point touched an unclean animal. Swimming with pork-eaters will condemn you and your children to eternal life without Allah's blessing.)

You can practice the Far Eastern martial arts and give a nod to real diversity with a gi that incorporates a Sharia-approved head covering! (Mind that you do not raise your hands against a man unless you want to be stoned straight to eternal damnation and shame your family.)

The modern muslim woman is concerned about her physical as well as her spiritual well-being and Ahiida.com helps her maintain her modesty while working on a bangin' bod for her husband or anyone who rapes her. Why should the men suffer the sight of flabby hips while they cut off your labia and clitoris? Think of the children!

Buy a Burqini today!

Warning: Some outfits may not fully conceal bomb vests from border guards.