Flibbertigibbet

I'm Serious This Time

Ok. Remember Fitness Goal #1?

And remember how Matt was talking smack?

And then finally I decided that being delusional wasn't bringing me any closer to my fitness goal.

Well, I have a buddy who has his own fitness goals. Right now he weighs 209 lbs and he wants to weigh 175. He is trying to get there by August 1.

So, we made a bet. If I beat him to his goal, I get a framed print I gave to him a couple of years ago. If he beats me he gets my iPod.

Of course, everyone seems to think that 6 weeks is plenty of time to get a six pack, so the terms of the bet are for him to lose 18 pounds (3 lbs a week) and for me to get a six pack. I'm not sure if that timeline is possible for me since I have never ever had six pack abs in my whole entire life.

So, I really do need to get to work because I didn't pay nearly that amount for that painting and I don't want to have to buy a painting AND a new iPod.

Wish me hard work and perserverance. Wait. That's my job. Never mind.

If you could just chear real loud, I'd appreciate it. Thanks!

Save the Boobies!

Trey Givens is right for once!

Click to save the boobies.

And much like real boobies, if you touch them once, you want to touch them again, so return to the site day after day and click until your heart is content.

Let This Be a Lesson to You

I was volunteered for some charity work through my company three years ago in a sort of auction. A couple of months ago, one of the people who purchased my services asked if the offer was still valid and I told them that it is.

The services they bought was for me to design and build a simple website for them. Sadly, when I agreed to the work, I thought others were going to assist me -- not so.

Well, now this guy wants a website for his business and I told him that I would do it as my schedule permitted. Unfortunately, my schedule has not permitted it. NOW, the guy is like, "This isn't for my personal photos. This is for a business."

And I'm like, "Understood, but you made your agreement with a charity."

The issues here are numerous, but the lesson I think people should bear in mind is that you get what you pay for. If you buy a cheap-ass website from a charity from people who didn't actually volunteer their services in the first place, you should expect rather poor service.

Ah well. We'll see what I can get done for him to get him out of the way.

Not a Ho

For the record, this blog is written by a dude. Ok?

I know I have a high-pitched voice and sometimes people think I'm a little fey, but I really am a guy.

Just for the record.

Who's keeping these records anyway?

How do I *Feel?*

Recently, in a meeting, the question was posed to me: How do you feel about making an hour drive for a 30 minute meeting?

My response was bewilderment. "What?"

"I said, how do you feel about making an hour drive for a 30 minute meeting?"

My burden of confusion was not lightened. "How do I feel about it?"

"Yes."

"Well, I must say that my feelings on the matter are not very positive, but I don't think my feelings are relavent. I think it would be a good idea to finally meet you in person. I will check our calendars and see if we can make it."

See, my problem here is the question about my feelings. What of my feelings? I am shocked that anyone would be so audacious as to ask me about something so personal in a business setting.

My feelings? You're asking me this without charging me $350 an hour?

Why not ask if I would be willing to drive an hour or if I thought it worthwhile? Why ask me how I FEEEEEELLLL about it?

Until asked, I really wasn't aware of feeling anything on the matter. But since the inquiry was made I had to acknowledge that I was annoyed.

But he did say he'd buy me lunch for my trouble, so next week I'm going to drive an hour for lunch and a 30 minute meeting and then I'll drive back.

A Really Good Pinot Noir: Sonoma Cutrer

Sonoma Cutrer is a Californian vineyard known for its chardonnay. I've never had it before, but that's what they're known for. However, in 1997, I am told, they started growing for Pinot noir and the 2002 is their inaugural vintage.

I was given the opportunity to taste this wine completely by a stroke of fortune. A charming man treated me to dinner and a concert some weeks back and the waitress raved about this wine. She told us about how it's the inaugural vintage and how it's only available in restaurants and there are only 9 restaurants in Georgia who serve it and they were able to get some 19 bottled of it.

Wine in restaurants is always marked up a bazillion percent, but this wine was just $60 for a bottle. Yes, pricey to my checkbook, but if I had known what was in store I would have paid up anyway.

Pinot noirs are very fun to me because I haven't had many and my experience has varied greatly. The ones I remember clearly are the Clos du Buois (Is that spelled correctly?) the Sebastiani and this one. I've listed them in order of my preference with the first one being not so good and this latest one being absolutely fantastic. (The Sebastiani is actually very good in my opinion.)

The thing that united Pinot noirs in my mind is the very strong finish. You drink it and it's pretty good and then you get punched in the neck with flavor and tannins. It's always a thrill to see how it's going to turn out.

My wine encyclopedia says:

Pinot Noir: This is one of the classic varieties of Champagne, although its claim to great fame lies immediately south in Burgundy. In the right place, under ideal climatic conditions, the Pinot noir can produce the richest, most velvet smooth wines in the world. Depending on climate and ripeness, its varietal flavour can range from cherries to strawberries.

My encyclopedia also references some particular Pinot being at its peak at 4 - 5 years, making this one particular wine somewhat young. How would I know, though?

The wine was a beautiful pink color. I'm actually looking for some socks in this color to go with a tie I have, but that's another story. It was a beautiful shade and the fragance was almost overpowering. The wine was served in glasses with nice, big bowls so, every time I took a sip I felt I might suffocate under the bouquet of this wine. I loved it.

The flavor was extraordinary. I would put this one closer to the strawberry end on the spectrum mentioned, but I am calling this from a memory several weeks old. Sadly, I didn't discuss the flavor with my date to get a better description. The finish was surprisingly smooth. It didn't attempt to choke me in tannins, but that isn't to say it wasn't nice and strong. Rather than being punched in the throat, this was much more like a comfortably firm handshake, um, to the throat.

I enjoyed this wine so much that I asked them to bag the bottle so that I could present it to you. I even recommended it to several people in my company. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

The restaurant was Murphy's in Atlanta, renown for its wine selection. I note them for their tendency to stack food. Sectional eaters do not fret! They will avoid the stacking if you ask them to.

So, if you get a chance, eat at Murphy's and try this wine.

Last Week's Vintage: Little Boomey Shiraz 2002

First, let's get the unpleasant things out of the way.

What can I say? This wine was unremarkable. That means I can't say much, really.

I bought it for the name -- again. And also the colorful, cute label. And the fact that I generally like Shiraz.

This one wasn't rotten, but it wasn't great either.

The bottle actually went bad before I drank more than two glasses of it -- that's how not memorable it is. Fortunately, it wasn't expensive.

Overheard on the Telephone

Scene: I lept out of the shower yesterday morning -- soaking wet -- to answer the phone.

Telemarketer: Mr. Flibbertigibbet, [pronounced incorrectly] I have a great offer! blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah...

Flibby: I'm not interested.

Telemarketer: But it's a great offer! blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah... [the same blah blah blah... as before]

Flibby: I'm not interested.

Telemarketer: May I ask why?

Flibby: I consider my interest alone to be primary in this circumstance.

Telemarketer: Excuse me?

Flibby: I am not interested and I consider that to be primary with regard to your offer. I simply have no interest.

Telemarketer: But it's a great offer! blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah... [the same blah blah blah... as before] Do you understand the terms of this great offer, Mr. Flibbertigibbet?

Flibby: Oh yes. I am quite familiar with the terms and my level interest has not changed in spite of you repeating those terms thrice over now.

Telemarketer: Thank you, Mr. Flibbertigibbet. [Still pronouncing it incorrectly.] Is there anything else I can do for you today?

Flibby: You've done nothing for me today already. You've only interrupted my shower and kept me standing here cold, wet, naked, and dripping on the floor for 5 minutes listening to you repeat yourself in spite of me clearly stating my lack of interest. If this is your usual level of service, I would beg of you to please provide no more.

Telemarketer: I'm very sorry for the trouble, sir. Have a good day.

Flibby: Good day, sir.

I hate it for telemarketers. They're just trying to get paid. That's why I remain polite and don't yell. I let them speak and politely decline their offers. Bless their hearts!

Go, get you another job, Punjabi. Somewhere they won't make you call mean people who don't want your discount card! Go! Go, now!