French People Aren't All Bad
Lest this post give you the impression otherwise, I do want to say that I firmly believe that there are some decent, rational French folk in this world somewhere.
This is a conversation I had tonight with a second-generation French person. I now refuse to talk to him as a result of this conversation.
Flibby: Hey HEY hey! I’m drinking Freedom Wine tonight!
Flibby: What are you up to?
Frenchie: gross.
Flibby: What’s gross?
Frenchie: ‘freedom’
Flibby: Aww… You’re Freedom, aren’t you?
Flibby: One day I hope to visit the country of Freed and eat lots of Freedom food and maybe even learn to speak Freedom!
Frenchie: It’s French, thank you.
Flibby: You can say that if you want, but I will be spreading a different rumor.
Frenchie: Vous êtes un exemple parfait de pourquoi les français détestent des Américains
Flibby: I don’t care what the French people think about Americans. If they’re smart, they’ll love me when they meet me.
Flibby: I don’t know why the French are bothering to hate Americans anyway.
Flibby: I, for one, give very little thought to French people.
Frenchie: Maybe Americans are jealous of the French because Americans are fat and ignorant.
Flibby: I’m American and I’m not fat and ignorant.
Frenchie: I can’t tell with the way you’re talking tonight.
Flibby: Maybe you need to get your sense of humor about you.
Flibby: You should be tickled that the word “French” has been equated with the word “Freedom.”
Frenchie: Well, I’m not.
Flibby: Fine. Give me a shout when you get your head out of your ass.
Frenchie: what is your problem tonight?
Flibby: I could ask you the same.
Frenchie: you think its funny but my entire family is french, my parents and sisters were born there
Frenchie: and your making jokes
Frenchie: i hear enough about it
Flibby: Do you believe that being French has anything to do with your quality as an individual?
Frenchie: no but it's my heritage
Frenchie: and my family is proud
Flibby: So?
Flibby: I don't care about your family.
Flibby: I don't care about the whole country of France.
Flibby: I am interested in YOU the individual.
Frenchie: ok.
Frenchie: well part of me
Frenchie: is that i am french
Flibby: And if being French means you have to think like a member of the herd, then I want you to stop.
Frenchie: i'm not thinking like a member of the herd
Flibby: Then you should be able to take a joke.
Frenchie: i am thinking just as you would if you came from another country
Flibby: Much in the way that I can joke about fat, stupid Americans.
Frenchie: whatever
Flibby: Exactly.
Frenchie: no not exactly.
Frenchie: you're just trying to make me look stupid
Flibby: You're acting stupid right now.
Frenchie: no i'm not
Frenchie: i'm not in a good mood. and you pushed the wrong button
Flibby: I can tell you're not in a good mood.
Flibby: But that's not my fault.
Flibby: At this point I'm not even interested in the fact that you are in a bad mood because you're behaving like an ass to me.
Frenchie: there is a lot you don't know about me AND my family and i've led on before that i don't appreciate you making jokes about france, and anything to do with is
Frenchie: it
Flibby: Again, stop thinking like a member of a herd and think like an individual.
Flibby: France doesn't control how you think.
Flibby: Neither does your family.
Flibby: So, think for yourself.
Flibby: De-nationalize yourself or something.
Frenchie: well mine does. i was also raised a lot differently than you.
Frenchie: so maybe our opinions differ.
Flibby: This isn't really an opinion. An opinion is like your favorite color.
Flibby: This is a difference in epitemology
Frenchie: and it's epistemology
Flibby: Yeah. It's a typo.
Frenchie: i think that there is nothing wrong with me being proud of my country. and my family.
Flibby: No. There isn't.
Flibby: There is a problem with you behaving like you are your country and your family.
Flibby: There is also a problem with you not getting a joke.
Flibby: And finally there is a problem with you being rude to me.
Flibby: replacing the word "French" with the word "Freedom" is absurd
Flibby: It's completely ridiculous.
Flibby: If you can't see the absurdity in that joke, you're hurtin', bro.
Frenchie: you're ridiculous
Flibby: This is a perfect illustration of why you're so conflicted all the time.
Flibby: You can't think about yourself.
Frenchie: please, enlighten me
Flibby: France was the birthplace of the Enlightenment. By your thinking, I should be getting lectures from you on that.
Flibby: Look, do whatever you gotta do.
Flibby: If you don't want to talk to me, that's fine.
Flibby: But if you are going to talk to me, one of the rules is that you can't act like a spoiled brat.
Flibby: If we are not in agreement on those things, then it's best if we part ways.
Frenchie: you're just offensive sometimes
Flibby: You don't know the meaning of the words.
Frenchie: but this constant nescience is obviously a contrivance of your upbringing, i can't blame you.
Flibby: Have you considered the option that perhaps I'm the product of my own devices?
Frenchie: maybe.
Flibby: Well, that is the case.
Flibby: And you should treat me as such.
Flibby: That's how I treat you.
Frenchie: regardless
Frenchie: you do not
Flibby: I do, too.
Flibby: I do not treat you as if you are the seedling of some country or the spawn of some clan.
Flibby: I treat you as if you think for yourself as yourself and yourself alone.
Frenchie: you are so inconversant it's sick.
Flibby: If you want me to consider the feelings of Frenchmen everywhere when talking to you, I'll have to concede that the task is beyond my ability.
Frenchie: a typical southern american
Flibby: Now you're treating me like I'm a member of the herd. You haven't basic courtesy.
Flibby: Good bye.
What kind of damn fool thinks that changing the word "French" to "Freedom" is at all insulting? Criminy.
I will point out that this is a young person of 20 years in age. I worry for the children.
Posted by Flibbertigibbet at October 6, 2004 09:30 PM
